You Are Here : The More You Know  >>  Child's Core Needs Thursday, April 24, 2014
     
  

LOVE is important all year long. Children who feel loved and cared for are healthier, do better in school and are more likely to make good choices. Showing someone you love them is easy. Love can be communicated in a word, a touch, or a smile. It doesn’t have to cost money, it just has to come from the heart. Here are 20 suggestions for showing your children and your family that you love them.(In recognition of Prevent Child Abuse Illinois’ 20th Anniversary)              

 

 

 

How to Show your Parental Love Tips ~ One of the most imporatant gifts a parent can offer to a child is to help him/her develop self-esteem. Your child needs your steady support and encourgement to discover his strengths. They need you to believe in them as they learn to believe in themselves. Loving them, spending time with them, listening to them and praising accomplishments are all part of the process.

 

Use non-violent forms of disciplin. Parents should institute both reqards and restrictions many years before adolescence to help prevent trouble during the teenage years. Allowing children of any age to constantly break important rules without being disciplined only encorurages more rule violations.

(American Academy of Pediatrics)

 

  

 
How to Make Your Family Strong

  

It seems that raising families gets more challenging all the time. The world is changing, and the job parenting is becoming more complicated. There's always new information about how to keep children healthy and safe and help them grow up to be successful and happy adults. Sometimes families fall apart, not because we don't love each other, but just because we dont know the best way to deal with problems. The truth is it takes work to make your family strong- but for every ounce of effort you invest in your family, the results will be amazing. How can you make your family strong?

 

 Here are five tips from Keep Your Family Strong:

 

  • Be strong and flexible. Being a good parent means having to look inside yourself to find strength. It also means you have to be open to new ideas.
  • Parents need friends. Let's face it, coordinating work, arranging childcare, and completing projects around the house can be very difficult. Having friends you can lean on for an extra hand, or who can just listen when you need to vent, can make a world of difference.
  • Being a great parent is part natural and part learned. Some things will come naturally, but learning more about what children really need will make you a better parent, and that will help our children be good parents when they have kids. Find out about classes, books, and support groups. Get advice from other parents and from the staff of your childhood center.
  • We all need help sometimes. When you have problems with alcohol, drugs or depression or just get stressed out , there's help available. If you lose your job, you can get financial support to pay the bills and keep food on the table. You can get  job training and help finding a new job. Your family is depending on you , so if you need help, reach out and ask for it.
  • Give your children the love and respect they deserve. Children are uniqque human beings. Parents need to build relationships with each of them just like we do with other adults. Kids need to know they are loved, understood, and appreciated for who they are. If we want our children to grow up to be confident and secure adults, we must express our love and concern from the very beginning.
 
For more information and ideas about how to keep your family strong, go to:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  
Belonging

Making wholesome connections and relationships in the school environment with other children, teachers, and administrators is important to children of all ages. Research shows that a sense of healthy belonging is essential to developing a child's growth, maturity, and exercise of responsible freedom. When alienation and isolation replaces belonging, children are at risk for destructive and self-destructive behaviors such as substance abuse, eating disorders, and gang involvement.

 

Observe your child interacting with other children then help your child with areas they struggle with. Help your child be involved with activites they already have skills and an interest in. Encourage your child to spend time with other children they already have a good relationship with. Also, encourage your child to have friends from a variety of places - school, after school activities, church, scouts, park district programs, etc. This will help your child to feel less isolation if they are struggling socially in one place as they will know they have other friends in other places.

  
Acceptance

All children should be accepted unconditionally. Parents and caregivers who are non-judgemental, do not compare their children to others, accept them as who they are, despite any misbehavior or any physcial and mental disabilities, will provide their children with a sense of security. Acceptance means a lot to a child and they need to be reminded just how special and important they are, this will help build self-esteem. Children need to hear that they are worthy of love. Remember to always give love with no strings attached, show love and acceptance through your daily expressions of affection, care and concern, spend time together - play, work and relax together, show that you feel good about them by hugging them, tell them often, "I like what you did/said" and "I love you."

  
Attention

Children love attention from their parents. If the children have enough attention/quality time with the adult, many behavorial problems and instances of acting out may be reduced. Sometimes children misbehave to get attention from parents. Children prefer negative attention (e.g., scolding, punishment) to no attention (being neglected or ignored). It is advisable for parents to set aside some time to have some activities to communicate your love with your children. A parent's availabilty gives importance and self-worth to children. When parents give undivided attention to their children, they will feel loved. For instance, engage in some bonding activites (e.g., memory games, imagery games, role-playing and so on) whenever the opportunity presents itself. Reading stories to your children before bed is a great time to bond. Do your best to give attention to your child to fulfill their emotional needs.

  
Accountability

Children will feel good that their parents trust them and count on them. They will learn how to take responsiblity for their actions, how to make good choices about their behavior, and face outcomes from their choices. Holding children accountable also helps develop their sense of responsiblity and acknowledgement of consequences to their actions. For example, if a child spills his water on the floor, the ideal response is for him to ask his mother to clean it up, and her to acknowledge he is responsible by giving him a rag to clean. By her showing her appreciation to her child's efforts to clean up the mess, the child learns that he is responsible to face the consquences of his action. If the mother punishes the child too severly or cleans up the mess for him, he is not learning appropriate consequences. Parents should be quick to praise the character and quality of their children and reward good behavior.

 

  
 
 
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